I’m not sad, but the amount of backed up emotion I have inside of me is making me want to cry. What am I doing with my life? Where am I going? Do I even have real priorities anymore?
It seems that money has become my life and everything else is just a pass time. I don’t know how to love someone anymore. I feel uncomfortable with affection. Compliments are meaningless. My relationship with God has come to a screeching halt. I haven’t truly enjoyed something in a very long time. I feel numb to the idea of how things used to be.
I want to buy a carton of cigarettes and drive until I can’t feel my ass.
I don’t want to keep letting anyone walk over me anymore, but I can’t say no.
I guess I’ll just keep hoping tomorrow will be the day I can change everything. But for now, I’ll sit In this car with a cigarette and watch the sunrise.